When I began to publish my writing online a year ago, I had no idea whether I would make it a habit or whether people would read anything I wrote. I hoped they would, but I had very little idea however all of this works. Blogging challenges were a mystery to me. My knowledge about how the whole community of personal bloggers from various platforms coalesces within social media circles was scant. The more I wrote and the more consistently I shared, the more learned about the unwritten expectations I would begin to place on myself. I also saw the constraints other people operated under, by choice, and how they differed from mine. Instinctively, I understood that being true to myself was the most important rule to follow. The other unwritten rules of blogging are just things I intuited along the way.

To my delight, I learned that writing my own version of someone else's idea is totally fine, as long as I give them a shout-out for the inspiration. Having someone do the reverse for me is high praise. Any time I've written something and then been able to read someone else's experiences in the same set of circumstances, it's been enjoyable. I end up feeling a particular closeness to the writer. I like it best when there are other significant differences in our lives, so I can see that my feelings of being unique aren't particularly valid. People tend to be more alike than they are different, in my experience. I wrote a post on what it was like to attend 13 schools over a 12-year period, only to read accounts from an English-Canadian woman a couple of years older than me who had done something similar. I also discovered a fellow who lives a continent away who is similar to me in many other ways besides our schooling history. Taking inspiration from others writing is a way of relating in a more deep and connected way than social media could ever offer.

Another ethical issue I and others have to deal with is the prevalence of AI writing tools and easily accessible they are. Things like grammar and spell checkers have been around for decades, but tools that can create an entire post from a mere prompt are new. I don't see myself letting some company's plagiarism machine create something that I would stick my name to. I don't have a problem having my spelling, grammar and punctuation checked by a computer because I'm used to that. Using a service that significantly changes my words, the tone and the structure just seems dishonest. There is a place for that in business, that being a cold and heartless environment. Blogging should have a soul. It should have a heart, and it should have an ethical code that the text you put under your byline is real and created by a human.

On the honesty scale, I'd say I come in around 90% to 95% honest. Sometimes one has to stretch the truth a bit to protect the innocent or make a story worth telling. My style of writing is autobiographical. There are times when I just can't remember the exact order of events, where I was living or who I was married to (just kidding). I do the best I can. I aim to be entertaining and interesting, not to please a professional fact-checker. Of course, there are some things about which I always try to be scrupulously honest. When I write about sobriety and recovery, you can take it to the bank. If I convey a particularly funny story about something that happened while I was in the army, there may be a detail or two where I take a literary license. Most of military life is dull and boring, so if something sounds interesting, it's probably just in the way I'm writing it.

I also tend to stick to just the facts when I write tech related posts. I want nothing more than to help someone find a real solution to a software issue. I'd feel horrible if I misled them about an app's suitability for a task, or if I wasn't diligent about pointing out a show stopping flaw. To the regular people in the world, a detailed explanation of menus, buttons, submenus and other user interface trivia is pure textual sleeping pills. For my fellow nerds and software geeks, it's vital information.

At some point, my goal is to have more time to write more polished and detailed work, to spend more time fine-tuning what I put out there for folks to read. I want to work through more than one draft, like what I envision a real writer does, Meanwhile, I will continue to be a happy hack making stuff that's good enough to share even if it won't win any rewards.

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This year's Thanksgiving has a special flavor. My son, who lives far away in Austin, Texas, is here for a visit. I still live in the house where he grew up, and he enjoys these nostalgic returns. After we got home from the airport yesterday, he went for a run. He came home to report that he'd passed the homes of old friends, the middle school he attended, and various spots where he's committed various teenage sins in his wayward youth.

A little later, we went to the train station to pick up his daughter, our granddaughter, who was traveling to meet us from Virginia, where she attends school. We all went out for a sushi feast before coming home to hang out, telling stories, and making each other laugh.

I get up early, and as I sit here writing, I have that wonderful protective parental feeling that reminds me of my younger days when I'd wait for the kids to get up so I could make them breakfast and start the day. Later on, we will all be traveling across town to attend the annual family gathering at the remnants of my uncle's farm, where I lived during my high school years. My daughter and two of our other grandchildren will be there, along with other relatives ranging in age from nearly 80 down to a six-year-old.

Luckily, no one will talk politics in mixed company. If the coast is clear, the progressive wing of the family may console each other under our breaths, but no one will be wearing a MAGA hat or thanking the Good Lord for the election of Donald Trump. We will be asked to give reports on anyone who is missing. One of the best parts of these rare family conclaves is the chance to catch up on family news.

Wonder Woman is sitting across from me, already beginning our holiday shopping. With five children and 13 grandchildren, she has a lot of gifts to buy. I send her ideas and give her feedback, but all the real work, including wrapping the gifts when they get here, falls to her. My Black Friday shopping is relegated to taking advantage of software sales, a relatively selfish pursuit that I thoroughly enjoy. I probably won't be getting many new apps this year because, quite frankly, I have so many already that it's hard to even find things on sale that I don't already have installed!

I make a gratitude list every day as part of my journaling practice. It helps me stay in tune with how fortunate I am in so many ways. Since last Thanksgiving, a lot has happened that has given me new reasons to be thankful. After a long pause, I started blogging again, giving myself a creative outlet that is enjoyable and therapeutic. I've enjoyed a marked resurgence in my interest in technology and married that to my writing to produce content that's been viewed over 400,000 times by people all around the world.

If you are reading this, know that I appreciate you. Thanks for being interested in my world. Feel free to leave a comment or to reach out on social media. Have a happy Thanksgiving, whether you live in the US or not. Let's make a better world in the year ahead.

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AMA - Finding comfort in the familiar things in life and having new adventures - which way do you lean?

Growing up as I did, where my family moved frequently and I was always changing schools, left me with a craving for stability and, well, sameness as an adult. I get a good deal of comfort out of living in the same house for decades now. I was glad to keep the same job in the same building for 20 years before retiring. On the other hand, traveling and seeing new things is a special treat. My favorite part of my months-long honeymoon was sleeping in a different place every night. I like both things.

In my job, most people are very unenthusiastic about having their computer updated, or god forbid, being issued a new one. When it comes to technology, the average person definitely prefers the familiar and comfortable over anything else. Not me. I'm always ready for new features, bug fixes, and extra security. Of course, since it's my profession, I'm more confident that I can fix any problems that pop up. Most of my career has been spent in education, where you would think people would be all about learning something new and expanding their horizons. You would be wrong if you thought that. Our ongoing controversy at work is around asking users to change the wireless network they use. That's it. Just select a different one from the list of what is available, type in your user name and password, and move on. Do I need to tell you how many meetings and conversations have already happened around this?

Lots of decisions come down to something familiar vs. something new. Take going out to eat, for instance. Wonder Woman and I have a handful of tried-and-true locally owned restaurants which we frequent. When I see a new place featured in the newspaper, I immediately think of checking it out if it looks like something we'd fancy. We like international cuisine and we need gluten-free options. Yet, when it's the end of a long work day and we've decided that cooking is too much of a hassle, we almost always head to one of the places where we've been 100 times before. It's not called comfort food for nothing.

I drive a 2005 Toyota Camry. It is a twenty-year-old hand-me-down from my mother, who literally drove it to church on Sundays. It has well over 200,000 miles. The paint is stained from being parked under an oak tree, and there are various scrapes and dents on every side of it. I've put exactly zero thought into getting a replacement for it. I haven't had a car payment since the Bush administration, and that thought horrifies me. I only drive it a couple of times a week to work and back anyway. Wonder Woman has a new Subaru Outback with all the bells and whistles, Apple Car Play, heated steering wheel, automatically adjusting mirrors and seats, a backup camera, the whole deal. I love to drive it and do so every chance I get. It is indeed a balancing act.

There are a few areas where I lean one way or another. I'm not much on rewatching movies or TV shows if I have already seen them, but I will re-read a book without hesitation. On my computer, I've used some of the same apps for many, many years, such as PathFinder (20 years), Evernote(15 years), and Launchbar(17 years) - all of which I ditched last year for replacements that I am now quite happy with. For other things, like email, I'm still using the same thing, the Gmail web interface that I have used since 2005.

They say that without newness, memories don't get created, and life just sort of blends into a big blob. I believe that, so I do seek out new adventures. But I also relish in the comfort of the familiar. I expect most people are the same in that regard.

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Some of the best advice I ever received was an admonition against burning bridges. An old co-worker told me that when I was getting ready to leave a job at which I was unhappy. The immature side of me wanted to leave in a blaze of glory, letting everyone know what I thought of them and the place that employed them. Somehow I'd convinced myself that my opinion was important and that all those people needed my approval to be happy - none of which was actually true. You may have seen someone do exactly what I contemplated. It's always icky and transparent and never looks good.

Sometimes people start burning their bridges when they are getting ready to leave a group as a way of self-protection. They don't want the separation to hurt so they begin to withdraw and cut off relationships. That's understandable. But I try to avoid doing it as best I can. Sometimes in our lives a certain group dynamic only exists for a short while under a certain set of circumstances that can never be recaptured - political campaigns, social movements, even some educational opportunities are like that. Just because the magic of the moment is gone doesn't mean that the people involved in it are no longer valuable, not because of what they can do for you, but just because people and relationships have an intangible worth that we honor when we continue to respect them.

In the current political environment in the US, I am very much of the mind to avoid people who like and support the president-elect. Their values and mine are obviously tremendously different. At a fundamental level, I just don't understand what makes them tick, nor do I have a desire to. But, I'm not seeking out every conservative I know to let them know that Lou Plummer thinks they are a bad person. There are ways to avoid people without purposefully alienating them. This in no way means that I'll silently nod my head when someone begins to spout off about how wonderful DT is, it just means that I don't feel the need to tell anyone off preemptively.

When someone decides that ending a relationship with me on a negative note is the thing to do, it makes me wonder what they hope to gain. It doesn't happen very often, and usually when it does, it's part of a mass casualty event when a disgruntled co-worker exits, but occasionally it's personal. It reeks of immaturity and poor judgement. I do the best I can not to take it personally. Some people are just built that way, I suppose. In reality, telling someone off, getting the last word, and making a dramatic exit only kind of feel good and only in the moment. That action is usually followed by a big let down and moments of self-doubt.

It's like my Mama (and probably yours too) used to say. If you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything. It’s not trite. It's true in most contexts. Exceptions can be made for calling out injustice and bigotry.

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For years, I fantasized about not having to work and all the really fine things I would do when that magical time arrived. Then I retired and was at a loss. I read a lot of books and watched a bunch of movies, but it wasn't what I'd call really fun. Instead, it felt like I was just doing things to occupy my time. Eventually, I just went back to work. That was a pretty good solution, but not a perfect one. I still think about not having to work a lot, but I think the next time I get that opportunity, it will be different.

My fantasy retirement includes plenty of time for writing. Over the past year, I have made blogging a priority by default. It's something I enjoy. I do it every day, and I can just imagine having the time to fully develop ideas, do research, and polish my posts instead of the rush jobs I'm knocking out now. I'd like to have a nice office space at home with decent speakers to play music on, a really comfortable office chair with all my tried-and-true computer essentials right there at my fingertips. I don't currently use my office space because it's not where Wonder Woman hangs out. When we are at home together, we like to be together.

I'm so conscious of my limited free time right now that I don't like to use any of it to do anything except exactly what I want to do, with a few limits. I imagine myself with more time, being more willing to get a walking routine established with just the right mix of music playlists and downloaded podcasts like I did before my mobility was limited by knee surgery. I would not be forced into early pre-dawn walks like I am now.

Since I'm a couple of years older than Wonder Woman, part of my fantasy retirement will be spent at home while she is still working. I will be able to use my time to do some of the chores, like grocery shopping, that we now do together on the weekends. I'm not going too far out on a limb by claiming that I will be Molly Maid or anything because that ain't happening. The cleaning and lawn services we've had over the past few years have been among the best investments we've ever made, and I am way too used to them to think about moving backward and taking that stuff back over myself.

A few years ago, I looked into volunteering at a few places using the skill set I have in technology. I didn't find anything that was a good fit around my work hours, but I'd be willing to look into that once more while having a much more flexible schedule. We have one of the best military history museums in the world in my hometown, but it's mostly staffed by retired guys from the 82nd Airborne and Special Forces. My half-communist ass would probably not fit in well there, although you never know. I have some retired military friends who are just as radical as I imagine myself to be.

The primary benefit of not having to go to work is that I'll no longer have to do customer relations. I'm not the biggest people person. Although I don't have any problems with getting along with folks at work 99% of the time, that remaining 1% is a giant PIA that sucks the joy out of too many days. When I never have to crawl under another desk to plug something in for another adult, I will truly be a happy man.

For the time being, however, I'm going to keep punching the clock and just enjoy knowing that, if push comes to shove, I can make my way towards the exit. I'll enjoy the 99% of the job that isn't aggravating and be extra grateful that I get to ride back and forth (and eat lunch!) with the love of my life.

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Now I've been a-lookin' for a job, but it's hard to find.
There's winners and there's losers.
And I am south of the line.
Well, I'm tired of gettin' caught out on the losin' end.
But I talked to a man last night.
Gonna do a little favor for him.
Atlantic City by Bruce Springsteen

Societies, including ours, have a habit of classifying people as winners and losers. In World War Two, Japanese soldiers committed mass suicide in battle after battle rather than surrendering or being beaten. I am reminded of a scene from the Will Ferrell comedy, Talladega Nights, after Ricky Bobby's sons brag of throwing their grandfather's war medals over a bridge and disrespecting a teacher, their dad exclaims "My boys are winners and winners get to do whatever they want." It's obvious that a lot of people share that sentiment.

Athletic contests by design have a winner and a loser at the end of the competition, but who is going to call Aaron Judge of the NY Yankees, a man whose salary is twice that of the entire Detroit Tigers, a loser? Are the athletes who go to the Olympic games and don't win a medal losers? Maybe they use that definition on their own minds as motivation, I don't know. I've only been around a couple of Olympians and I didn't ask them. I just know that from my own athletic career, I felt like a winner every time I gave the competition everything I had. What more could I do?

I've never been as opposed to anything in my life as I was against the Us war with Iraq. I opposed it with everything I had. When Obama, who unlike other prominent Democrats, had never supported the war, was elected, I felt like the antiwar movement had won. So did a lot of other folks. Most coalitions closed up shop as we waited for the troops to come home. Only it took years for the last soldier to leave Iraq (2011). When Obama left office in 2017, there were still American soldiers in Afghanistan for reasons no one could really explain.

There are people who turn just about everything into a competition to satisfy some need they have to be better than other people. I've known too many dentists and ad execs who, in their minds, turn into Tour de France riders on a Saturday morning bicycle ride at the club ride. Putting other people in danger and disrupting the flow of the entire undertaking is entirely acceptable in their minds if they can beat a bunch of school teachers and retirees to the next stop sign. Even on something as neutral as the Appalachian Trail, there were those people who bragged at camp sites about how many miles they'd covered and how fast they'd hiked. No one cared.

It's funny how these competitive types never try to win the competition on the job to close the most tickets or help the most customers. I wonder why.

After the recent election, a lot of people feel like they are on the winning side, but I have news for them. Unless they are in the 1%, they are going to come out of the next four years on the losing end. The educational system is going to suffer, and that hurts everyone. Unmitigated climate change will accelerate, and that hurts everyone. Pollution will increase. Government services will be deprecated. We will all live in a less functional country. All of that Trump-style winning is going to help one fat guy with a bad combover and too much makeup.

Winners are happy people. Winners are those amongst us who live in peace. They don't have the biggest houses or the nicest cars. What they have is appreciation for what they've got and an absence of longing for what they don't. They enjoy what they enjoy without a need to beat someone else. I like winners like that.

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