On Identity
Many adamantly profess to hate labels when it comes to people. They argue that as complex, individualistic beings, our true nature can't be captured with conventional language. Well, of course it can't, but unfortunately, until we develop the ability to do Vulcan mind melds, we are going to have to use our words.
Most of my adult life, I've used the convenient crutch of describing myself by my job title, conflating what I did with who I was. It was an easy and convenient (and kind of lazy) way to self identify. Of course, there are numerous ways to label ourselves. We do it by our relationships. I get to be Mr. Wonder Woman quite a bit because my wee, shy, introverted wife attracts a lot of attention by virtue of a high-profile job and her athletic prowess. When I go visit my dad, despite being a grandfather myself, I get defined as being Johnny's boy, which kind of makes me feel like Tony Soprano.
As a retired person, I suppose I'll use that label from now on and let people make assumptions based on that, since most of them will be true. They will also make assumptions based on pale skin, gender and age and most of those assumptions will not be correct. I'm not a contrarian just to be one. I am, unfortunately it seems, a minority among white men my age. Most of my peers are conservatives whose actions demonstrate a belief that people of color, gays and women have gone too far, gotten too many privileges and no longer know their place. Some of them are willing to say that out loud. Others will deny supporting those beliefs while doing absolutely nothing to stand in the way of their enforcement.
It is neither lazy nor wrong to assign characteristics to groups of people as long as you keep the exceptions in mind. I make plenty of disparaging remarks about white people because, let's face it, we have a poor track record in many areas where I am keeping score. Conservatives disparage identity politics. It makes them angry when we stubbornly point out systemic racism, systemic homophobia, systemic sexism. Now that they've won the fifth-closest election in American history and labeled it a mandate (because the truth doesn't matter)l, they are doing their level best to erase any mention of Wounded Knee, Selma, and women's suffrage from school libraries.
Suffice, to say, for me, worrying about labels is not something I engage in. I'm not bothered by anyone's good faith attempt to describe a person or group of people in polite, conventional terms. And, certainly, if you are describing a group of obnoxious assholes, feel free to label them as such. If I don't think you can defend your assertion, I'll probably let you know.
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